Monday's Marriage Moment -- Whatcha Looking At?

Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.

-Hebrews 12: 1 - 2

God is been extremely faithful to me. He has blessed every aspect of my life. I have a great husband, awesome children, a wonderful career, and so much more. Yet, there are times when I get discouraged. There are times when I feel inadequate. Sometimes I mourn the fact that I am not further along in life. Every now and then I feel that I am not enough -- not spiritual enough, not smart enough, not pretty enough. Maybe you have never felt that way, but I sure have. 

I notice, however, that I feel like this the most when I am looking at someone else's life or someone else's accomplishments -- when I begin to compare where I am to where they are. See, comparison is different than jealousy. Jealousy is when you have feelings of resentment regarding someone else's success. Jealousy reacts to the other person. It lashes out and has ill will. Comparison is defined as examining two or more things to determine similarities and differences. Comparison, for our context, is when you make something the measuring stick by which you determine your ability. I have, sometimes even unknowingly, made comparisons between my life and the lives of others. Have you? Have you looked at another couple's marriage and thought their marriage was so much better than yours? Did you begin to wish that your spouse was like their spouse? Did you use that husband as the measuring stick? If so, you know that comparison leaves you feeling disappointed and unsatisfied. It is not God's plan for people to be the measuring stick. Sure, they can provide examples for us, but they are not the standard. 

It is made very clear in Hebrews 12:1 - 2 that while we are running the race of life, our focus needs to be on Jesus. He is the author and the finisher. That means that He wrote the story so He knows it intricately from beginning to end. So, it makes sense to look to Him for direction. In a race, the participants must be focused on the finish line. They can't win if they are looking at the crowd or even the other competitors. Focusing on these distractions will get them off course and cause them to lose. They must focus on the finish. We must do the same. Though it seems harsh, I must remind you that anything we stare at too long becomes an idol, and God is not tolerant of idols. He is actually in the business of destroying them. 

So, dear friend, take your eyes off of your surroundings. Stop focusing on the couple you think has a better marriage, the friend who has the career you want, the minister whose ministry seems to be growing faster than yours, and all that will serve as a distraction. Set your focus and affections on Jesus today. Listen to hear what He wants to say to you about your life and direction. Look unto Jesus, the author and finisher of your faith!