Remember the former things of old, for I am God, and there is none like Me, declaring the end from the beginning, and from ancient times things that are not yet done, saying, "My counsel shall stand, and I will do all My pleasure".
-Isaiah 46:9
Happy Memorial Day! Today is the day that we honor the sacrifice of those who died in the line of duty. We celebrate those who believed in their cause enough to lay down their lives to defend it. Today we remember.
We hear so many messages this day and time on moving on and letting go that we forget the power of remembering. Yet, there are many times in the bible that God told His people to remember. In Deuteronomy 8, He commands the children of Israel to remember that it was God who delivered them from Egypt and into the Canaan. In Exodus 20, we are commanded to remember the Sabbath day and to keep it holy. In 1 Corinthians 11, we are told that as often as we partake in communion we are remember Jesus and His sacrifice.
Remember, according to dictionary.com, means "to recall to the mind by an act or effort of memory; to think of again". It may take effort to remember some things, but it is well worth it. What does any of this have to do with marriage? I am glad that you asked. Today, can you recall to your mind the sacrifices that your spouse made for you and your marriage. While you are celebrating those who sacrificed their very lives, today celebrate the one God gave you that is still here. Have they sacrificed their time for you? Have they sacrificed their own preferences and desires for your marriage? Have they sacrificed themselves in some way for you? If so, celebrate them. Intentionally bring those things to your mind. It is easy to think of times when they didn't but don't make that your focus this week. Focus on the things they have done to be the spouse that God called them to be.
Personally, I can reflect on how John sacrificed so that I could go back to school and get my master's degree. Many times he had to be both mother and father. There were times when he could have gone home and relaxed after catering events that he chose to come support me with Believing Wives. He has done so many things even though he didn't necessarily want to in order to push me into being who God called me to be.
As you think of the sacrifice of the fallen, and the ultimate sacrifice of our Lord and Savior, think of the many times that your spouse has laid down their time, energy, and desires for you. Celebrate them today!
Monday, May 29, 2017
Monday, May 22, 2017
Monday's Marriage Moment -- Lessons from My Lost Phone
“Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal; but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.
-Matthew 19:20
So, I lost my phone yesterday. Yeah, you can imagine the frustration that I felt. There are pictures, notes, and all sorts of important information in that phone. Then there is the cost of the phone itself and the complexities of getting another one. I lost my phone, but I learned some lessons. Here are a few that I think are worth sharing:
I use my phone too much
Though I don't spend hours each day on my phone, I realize that I spend too much time on it. I know this because I got quite a bit done yesterday afternoon without it. I accomplished things that I had put off for several days. I realized that I have more time than I think I do. I just don't appropriate that time as wisely as I should. That hurt me to admit, but it is true. Then came the icing on the cake: John said, "You will find some other device to get on. You can't just be here without it". Ouch! That means he sees me with my phone in my hand too much. So, I needed this time without it. Perhaps, you do too. Are you spending quality with your spouse or do they see you spending more time with your device than with them? Has anything become more of a focus for you than they are? Honestly evaluate yourself and make whatever change is necessary.
Have it before you need it
Boy, was I thankful that I had insurance on my phone. It seems like such an unnecessary expense until you need it, but when you need it you will be so glad that you have it. You can't purchase fire insurance after a house fire. You can't prepare for a financial emergency after you have one. Much the same, you can't wait until there is a major issue in your marriage to get prepared. So often, we think fighting is for when something major happens, but many times it is too late then. I encourage you to insure your marriage with kind words, actions, and deeds. Insure your marriage with great communication and intimacy. Insure your marriage by covering it in prayer and seeking God's will above your own. Do it before you find yourself in dire need of it. It would have been very costly for me if I would not have had the insurance. If we don't prepare now, it could be very costly for our marriages later.
Don't sweat the small stuff
It didn't feel small, but it was small. After all, it was just a phone. It is easy in the moment to make something this small seem gigantic, but we have to resist the temptation. While I was looking for my phone I could feel frustration and anger rise in me. I knew that there was no one to blame and no need to get bent out of shape, but I felt the anxiety anyway. I had to constantly remind myself that it was just a phone. There are issues in our marriages that can seem so big in the moment, but we need to remind ourselves to keep things in perspective. Did your husband leave his clothes next to the hamper instead of putting them in the hamper? They are just clothes. Did your wife forget to close a cabinet door? It was just a door. Don't make a mountain out of a mole hill. The enemy would love for you to lose fellowship over something so small. Determine what is worth a discussion and what is not. My phone could be replaced. Relationships are not so easy to replace. Choose wisely!
-Matthew 19:20
So, I lost my phone yesterday. Yeah, you can imagine the frustration that I felt. There are pictures, notes, and all sorts of important information in that phone. Then there is the cost of the phone itself and the complexities of getting another one. I lost my phone, but I learned some lessons. Here are a few that I think are worth sharing:
I use my phone too much
Though I don't spend hours each day on my phone, I realize that I spend too much time on it. I know this because I got quite a bit done yesterday afternoon without it. I accomplished things that I had put off for several days. I realized that I have more time than I think I do. I just don't appropriate that time as wisely as I should. That hurt me to admit, but it is true. Then came the icing on the cake: John said, "You will find some other device to get on. You can't just be here without it". Ouch! That means he sees me with my phone in my hand too much. So, I needed this time without it. Perhaps, you do too. Are you spending quality with your spouse or do they see you spending more time with your device than with them? Has anything become more of a focus for you than they are? Honestly evaluate yourself and make whatever change is necessary.
Have it before you need it
Boy, was I thankful that I had insurance on my phone. It seems like such an unnecessary expense until you need it, but when you need it you will be so glad that you have it. You can't purchase fire insurance after a house fire. You can't prepare for a financial emergency after you have one. Much the same, you can't wait until there is a major issue in your marriage to get prepared. So often, we think fighting is for when something major happens, but many times it is too late then. I encourage you to insure your marriage with kind words, actions, and deeds. Insure your marriage with great communication and intimacy. Insure your marriage by covering it in prayer and seeking God's will above your own. Do it before you find yourself in dire need of it. It would have been very costly for me if I would not have had the insurance. If we don't prepare now, it could be very costly for our marriages later.
Don't sweat the small stuff
It didn't feel small, but it was small. After all, it was just a phone. It is easy in the moment to make something this small seem gigantic, but we have to resist the temptation. While I was looking for my phone I could feel frustration and anger rise in me. I knew that there was no one to blame and no need to get bent out of shape, but I felt the anxiety anyway. I had to constantly remind myself that it was just a phone. There are issues in our marriages that can seem so big in the moment, but we need to remind ourselves to keep things in perspective. Did your husband leave his clothes next to the hamper instead of putting them in the hamper? They are just clothes. Did your wife forget to close a cabinet door? It was just a door. Don't make a mountain out of a mole hill. The enemy would love for you to lose fellowship over something so small. Determine what is worth a discussion and what is not. My phone could be replaced. Relationships are not so easy to replace. Choose wisely!
Monday, May 15, 2017
Monday's Marriage Moment -- How Dare You!
So when they had eaten breakfast, Jesus said to
Simon Peter, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you love Me more
than these?” He said to Him, “Yes, Lord; You know that I love You.” He said to
him, “Feed My lambs.” He said to him again a second time, “Simon, son of
Jonah, do you love Me?” He said to Him, “Yes, Lord; You know that I love You.” He
said to him, “Tend My sheep.” He said to him the third time, “Simon, son of
Jonah, do you love Me?” Peter was grieved because He said to
him the third time, “Do you love Me?” And he said to Him, “Lord, You know
all things; You know that I love You.” Jesus said to him, “Feed My sheep.
John 21:15-17
God is in the restoration business. He knows that we are fallen humans, and that we are prone to messing up. He sees it, and He loves us anyway. Take Peter, for example. Jesus told Peter that he was going to deny Him. He knew that Peter was going to mess up, but He loved him anyway. He loved him and restored him to his rightful position. In our text for today, we see that Jesus still wanted Peter to "feed His sheep". He still had work for him to do. He didn't allow his failure to disqualify Him from a greater purpose. We read that, but I wonder if we believe the same restoration He has for Peter is available to us.
See, that is the problem. We believe that God can restore Peter, who denied him -- multiple times -- but we don't believe He can restore us from our shortcomings. We believe that He gave Abraham and Sarah their promise even in their old age, but we think that it is too late for us to receive ours. We believe that Jesus cast out demons and destroyed yokes of bondage, yet we think we will suffer with ours forever. How dare we! How dare we believe that God created the world from nothing and then doubt that He can change our world! How dare we believe that God created man in His image and likeness but doubt that He can ever change us! How dare we believe that He raised Lazarus from the dead but doubt that He can breathe life into our marriages, finances, and ministries! How dare we! This is a time in which we can no longer read the bible as if it a story. We must read it as truth that is applicable to our lives. God really did the things that are written. He really healed, restored, and set free! He allowed them to be written so that we would have an example on which to base our faith.
"How dare you" is a phrase that implies shock, belief, or indignation. I believe that is how God feels about our lack of belief today. He wants us to trust Him completely, and it is insulting to Him when we don't. Either we believe the word of God is true, or it isn't. Put your faith into action this week and believe that God is going to do exactly what He promised. Make it personal. Believe Him for something specific in your life. Find a scripture that supports it and refuse to be shaken. We will no longer operate in fear and doubt, but we will stand boldly, firmly, and confidently in our beliefs!
Monday, May 8, 2017
Monday's Marriage Moment -- I'm Drawing a Line in the Sand!
When I fixed My limit for it, and set bars and doors; When I said, 'This far you may come, but no farther, and here your proud waves must stop!’
-Job 38:10-11
I had a wonderful weekend away with John, the kids, and some dear family friends. We had a great time celebrating my long time friend who earned her doctorate degree. While we were away, however, we noticed that the truck was making a weird noise. When we returned, John called our mechanic and described the issue to him. He was told to bring the truck in this morning and that from his description it could cost from $200 - $600 to repair. John relayed the conversation to me, and I just took it in stride. It wasn't until a few moments later that I found myself getting angry. I was in my bathroom, and out of my mouth I just began to declare that it would not cost that much to repair the truck. I told the enemy that I was sick of his tricks, and that I wasn't taking it this time. I know that I looked like a crazy woman, but I was consumed with righteous indignation. I reminded myself of God's promises for my life and family, and I refused to settle for less.
As I was allowing the lioness in me to roar, I was reminded of Job 38:11. God was revealing to Job that He was omnipotent -- all powerful. He reminds Job that it was His supreme power that created the world and all that was in it. Then He gets to verse 11 which gives me strength every time I read it: When I said, 'This far you may come, but no farther, and here your proud waves must stop!’. The God that we served created the massive, swelling, and often unruly seas, and He commands them such that they can go no further than He allows. Do you get that? They can't overtake the land because He won't let them. He commands them to stop and they do. You were created in His image and likeness which means that you have that same power!
So, I am encouraging you to draw a line in the sand, today. Wake up the warrior in you and begin to make some declarations and decrees. Command those things that are coming against your marriage that they can go no further! This stuff stops today! Stand toe-to-toe with communication issues, financial concerns, and whatever is challenging your peace and tell it to cease. Don't play with it. Don't entertain it. Don't have a pity party about it. Command it. The same power that allowed Jesus to speak to the waves and command them to stop resides in you, Believer!
Declare that the enemy can't take one more thing from you. He has no power, and he gets no glory! Draw a line in the sand today!
-Job 38:10-11
I had a wonderful weekend away with John, the kids, and some dear family friends. We had a great time celebrating my long time friend who earned her doctorate degree. While we were away, however, we noticed that the truck was making a weird noise. When we returned, John called our mechanic and described the issue to him. He was told to bring the truck in this morning and that from his description it could cost from $200 - $600 to repair. John relayed the conversation to me, and I just took it in stride. It wasn't until a few moments later that I found myself getting angry. I was in my bathroom, and out of my mouth I just began to declare that it would not cost that much to repair the truck. I told the enemy that I was sick of his tricks, and that I wasn't taking it this time. I know that I looked like a crazy woman, but I was consumed with righteous indignation. I reminded myself of God's promises for my life and family, and I refused to settle for less.
As I was allowing the lioness in me to roar, I was reminded of Job 38:11. God was revealing to Job that He was omnipotent -- all powerful. He reminds Job that it was His supreme power that created the world and all that was in it. Then He gets to verse 11 which gives me strength every time I read it: When I said, 'This far you may come, but no farther, and here your proud waves must stop!’. The God that we served created the massive, swelling, and often unruly seas, and He commands them such that they can go no further than He allows. Do you get that? They can't overtake the land because He won't let them. He commands them to stop and they do. You were created in His image and likeness which means that you have that same power!
So, I am encouraging you to draw a line in the sand, today. Wake up the warrior in you and begin to make some declarations and decrees. Command those things that are coming against your marriage that they can go no further! This stuff stops today! Stand toe-to-toe with communication issues, financial concerns, and whatever is challenging your peace and tell it to cease. Don't play with it. Don't entertain it. Don't have a pity party about it. Command it. The same power that allowed Jesus to speak to the waves and command them to stop resides in you, Believer!
Declare that the enemy can't take one more thing from you. He has no power, and he gets no glory! Draw a line in the sand today!
Monday, May 1, 2017
Monday's Marriage Moment -- Whatcha Looking At?
Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.
-Hebrews 12: 1 - 2
God is been extremely faithful to me. He has blessed every aspect of my life. I have a great husband, awesome children, a wonderful career, and so much more. Yet, there are times when I get discouraged. There are times when I feel inadequate. Sometimes I mourn the fact that I am not further along in life. Every now and then I feel that I am not enough -- not spiritual enough, not smart enough, not pretty enough. Maybe you have never felt that way, but I sure have.
I notice, however, that I feel like this the most when I am looking at someone else's life or someone else's accomplishments -- when I begin to compare where I am to where they are. See, comparison is different than jealousy. Jealousy is when you have feelings of resentment regarding someone else's success. Jealousy reacts to the other person. It lashes out and has ill will. Comparison is defined as examining two or more things to determine similarities and differences. Comparison, for our context, is when you make something the measuring stick by which you determine your ability. I have, sometimes even unknowingly, made comparisons between my life and the lives of others. Have you? Have you looked at another couple's marriage and thought their marriage was so much better than yours? Did you begin to wish that your spouse was like their spouse? Did you use that husband as the measuring stick? If so, you know that comparison leaves you feeling disappointed and unsatisfied. It is not God's plan for people to be the measuring stick. Sure, they can provide examples for us, but they are not the standard.
It is made very clear in Hebrews 12:1 - 2 that while we are running the race of life, our focus needs to be on Jesus. He is the author and the finisher. That means that He wrote the story so He knows it intricately from beginning to end. So, it makes sense to look to Him for direction. In a race, the participants must be focused on the finish line. They can't win if they are looking at the crowd or even the other competitors. Focusing on these distractions will get them off course and cause them to lose. They must focus on the finish. We must do the same. Though it seems harsh, I must remind you that anything we stare at too long becomes an idol, and God is not tolerant of idols. He is actually in the business of destroying them.
So, dear friend, take your eyes off of your surroundings. Stop focusing on the couple you think has a better marriage, the friend who has the career you want, the minister whose ministry seems to be growing faster than yours, and all that will serve as a distraction. Set your focus and affections on Jesus today. Listen to hear what He wants to say to you about your life and direction. Look unto Jesus, the author and finisher of your faith!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)